Navigating Grief During the Holidays

For many, the festive season brings joy. But if someone you love has died, December can feel more heavy than bright.

Whether it’s the first Christmas without them or one of many, the ache of their absence can rise quietly — in the carols, in the empty chair, in the moment you almost buy them a gift out of habit.

Here in the Northern Rivers, where the season is marked by beach gatherings, backyard lunches, and long warm evenings, it can feel strange to carry grief while the world seems to celebrate.

If that’s where you are right now, I hope these ideas offer you a little comfort.

Allow space for your grief

You don’t need to be merry. You don’t have to “put on a brave face.”
If you feel sad, let yourself feel sad.
If you want to cry, cry.
If you need to step away from the crowd for a while, do that.

Grief isn’t something you fix. It’s something you learn to live with — and the holidays often bring it to the surface.

Include your person in gentle ways

Even if they’re not physically with you, your person is still part of your life. You might:

• Light a candle in their honour

• Share a memory over lunch

• Play their favourite song

• Set a place for them at the table

These small rituals don’t have to be dramatic. They just help us feel connected.

Take breaks from tradition (if you want to)

If the usual celebrations feel too hard, it’s okay to do things differently.
You might skip the big lunch and go for a swim.
You might travel somewhere new.
You might keep it low-key and stay home with a few close people.

There’s no “right” way to do the holidays — especially when you’re grieving.

Let people help (and let others know how to)

Often friends and family want to support you but don’t know how.
If you can, let them know what would actually help — a quiet visit, a meal, a walk, someone to sit beside you without needing to fix anything.

And if you're supporting someone else through grief, your steady presence may mean more than you realise.

Final thoughts

Grief and love go hand in hand. If you’re grieving this holiday season, it’s only because you loved someone deeply — and still do.

So take the pressure off. Be kind to yourself. And remember: you’re not alone.

If you’re grieving someone this December, and you’d like to honour them in some way — quietly or creatively — I’d be honoured to help. From simple memorials to meaningful rituals, I’m here when you need.

Need to speak with a Funeral Director immediately? Please call 0410 478 713 or 1300 242 490